The Holiday Roller Coaster

For many people, this time of year is all about the love of family and friends, festivities, joyful gatherings and the spirit of giving.

For others, especially individuals and families affected by the disease of addiction, the holiday season holds feelings of depression, darkness and despair. In 2015, in the midst of my 27 years of sobriety, I needed to be hospitalized because of depression and suicidal ideations. Practicing extra measures of self care and safety, especially around the holidays, can be the difference between life and death. The information below was taken from a September 2023 article written in Everyday Health by columnist Michelle Pugle.

How to Manage Depression During the Holidays

Depression around the holidays can happen for many reasons, says Akua Boateng, PhD, a Philadelphia-based psychotherapist who specializes in individual and couples therapy.

“The holidays bring an increase in thoughts about family, relationships, and social engagement. If there are issues within these dynamics in our lives, depression can surface,” Dr. Boateng says.

And this time of year may also raise expectations of spending more time with family than usual, which can be stressful for some, says Sarah Gundle, PsyD, a New York City–based clinical psychologist in private practice who specializes in trauma. Boateng adds that events with family may bring up old conflicts and emotions, which can be challenging to navigate.

No matter the cause of your low mood or negative feelings, having an arsenal of healthy coping strategies can help you prepare for and get through the festive months ahead when you’re managing such mixed emotions. While practicing good self-care is always important, it is even more important during the often stressful holidays!

Here are five expert-recommended strategies:

1. Stay Active and Get Outdoors

Moving your body is one of the best science-backed ways to cope with depression during any season, and the holidays are no exception. A meta-analysis of 23 studies showed that exercise is an effective way to manage depression and could also be useful when combined with antidepressant medication.

Getting outside and exercising can help you avoid isolation and loneliness during the holiday season. Spending time in nature is another way to reduce your risk of depressive symptoms. One study showed that being surrounded by green space can reduce one’s risk of mental health conditions in the long term.

RELATED: 7 Great Exercises to Ease Depression

2. Share How You’re Feeling With Trusted Loved Ones

Surround yourself with people you can rely on during the holidays — whether it be family or friends — to help manage holiday depression. Ashley Bernardi, author of Authentic Power: Give Yourself Permission to Feel, says she reached out to trusted friends and shared how she was feeling during her darkest days with depression.

While she wasn’t sure how her friends would react, they gave her hope that healing was possible, helping her feel like she had something to live for.

If you confide in your loved ones about how you’re feeling, they may offer empathy, share their own experiences with you to help you feel less alone, or even suggest additional options for support that you may not know about.

“Never underestimate the power and love of your own community. People want to help. All you need to do is ask for it,” she says.

3. Assess Your Relationships and Set Boundaries

It is important to monitor your emotions around different people in your life and set boundaries accordingly. This could mean limiting the time you spend during the holidays with people who cause you to feel negative emotions or exacerbate your depressive symptoms, as well as establishing boundaries for your interactions with and availability to those people.

“It’s very important to be mindful of your own boundaries — and when something feels overwhelming, try to pay attention and act on it,” adds Gundle.

A mental health professional can help you learn how to set boundaries, says Boateng.

4. Consider Volunteering Throughout the Holiday Season

Gundle suggests volunteering as a possible way to cope with depression during the holidays. A 2021 review showed that volunteering for 2 or 3 hours a week or even just 1 to 10 hours a month may offer myriad mental health benefits, such as:

Finding a volunteer opportunity that’s right for you will depend on several factors, including what activities you feel comfortable with, how much time you’re able to commit, and which causes you’re passionate about. (ASIDE: TRICIRCLE NEEDS YOU!) “It’s a great way to connect with something other than yourself, which I find helps greatly when those feelings of depression creep up,” Bernardi says. If you’re wondering how to get started with volunteering, organizations like VolunteerMatch can help you find the right fit in your area.

5. Create a Coping Sheet or Depression Toolkit

A coping sheet is a list of favorite activities you can turn to when you’re feeling depressed. You can create one on your own, with your family members, or with your therapist. Bernardi says she made a coping sheet filled with actions she can take to help her manage depressive symptoms.

“I decorated it with beautiful colors and taped it to my refrigerator, so I had a constant reminder that there is always something to do to help lift my mood,” Bernardi says. In her case, those favorite mood-boosting activities include lighting candles, watching ballet, listening to classical music, painting pictures, singing, and meditating.

Other self-care activities you could add to your toolkit, according to the University of Michigan’s Eisenberg Family Depression Center in Ann Arbor:

When and Where to Seek Help for Depression

While self-help strategies may ease life with depression, they rarely work on their own. Psychotherapy administered by a mental health professional, sometimes in conjunction with medication, is needed for long-term improvement.

It’s especially important to seek help if you have any signs of severe depression, says Gundle, including:

You can find professional help through a variety of avenues:

Together WE are Stronger!

(Originally published in TriCircle’s Newsletter, December 2023)